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Listening to Connect: Online Course Available

8/7/2020

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How often do we listen with the intention to connect, to be present with the other human being in front of us? How often are we only appearing to listen while in fact thinking about my reply? Listening to connect is foundational to community living, as an intention, as a skill to practice, as a capacity to increase.

How the series works:
This series takes place over 4 weeks and is customizable to your own pace. There are 4 sections, including a video and practices on a specific aspect of Listening to Connect.  You will be invited to practice these listening skills by applying them immediately with the people that you are currently living with (this supports us in building community where we are, now, without waiting for the "perfect" community). You will also be invited to find a listening buddy to practice with.

This series is based on NVC. Each section will also include increasing needs language and awareness. I also offer this course as an inperson workshop. Email me for details. This course is the suggested prerequisite for Listening to Understand. 
Access the Course

​Contribution to Selene's Financial Needs:
My preference is to move towards gift economy. For me, this is an application of needs consciousness that is at the core of this work. I'm happy to receive whatever you feel comfortable to give while also asking that you consider my financial needs. The idea is that you choose a number that balances both our needs. I have publicly shared my financial needs so that you can make a grounded decision.

My preference would be that everyone connected with themselves to find an amount that balances both our needs, and I'm aware that may take time and energy that not everyone has. If you prefer not to choose a number yourself, here is a suggested sliding scale: 20€ - 50€

Learn more about this here:
http://www.vibrantlyalive.me/enter-into-gift-economy-with-me.html
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Call to Create a Team in Ireland

7/3/2020

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 Over the past few months, Ireland went into lockdown to slow the spread of Covid 19. Most of my work (as a trainer sharing NVC) was canceled, and what wasn't canceled was moved to Zoom (like everyone else!). I gave myself permission to let go of notions of "productivity" and instead I spent time with myself. 

The first month was an unwinding of the anxiety of the busy pace I'd been living since last December, though it was replaced with anxiety about the pandemic, let's be honest.  I experienced a reorientiation to what is important to me, and faced some existential questions:

What am I doing with my one glorious life?
Why have I been spending my precious, limited time and energy on things that are not going to bring me the life I dream of? 

In the terrifying face of global climate change and biodiversity loss and this internal ticking clock counting down the remaining time we have for collective action, spurring a sense of urgency within me, I have carried the question:

What is my work to do?
What is my contribution to new/old world we so desperately need?  


What arose in me, as the weeks passed, was a clarity of purpose. The answer that consistantly came to me was community living. My dream has long been to live in community. I originally came to NVC to support my marriage, and I stayed with NVC, worked towards certification, and committed to the hard work of integrating nonviolence into my life for the rest of my life, because I thought this was the only visible step towards living in community I could grasp.

So, my next question to myself was:

If I am so clear I want to live in community, and so clear I want to bring my delivery of NVC in service to community living, why am I not doing it? 

That was a much more painful question to face. Several responses within me arose, my struggle with general disempowerment, lack of hope, intense grief over the state of the world, and a deep refusal to do it "alone".  Facing this pain became the next bit of work of my time in lockdown.

I have since experienced a shift. I realize that I don't need to do this alone. I can ask for support. More than that, I can create a team of people to work together. 

My dream is to form a team of 4-5 people, local to Ireland, who would like to work with me to support forming and established live-in communities in building nonviolence and NVC into the foundation of their social structures and way of life.
  • We would be organizing workshops focused on sharing NVC in such a way that will support community members and those intersted in living in community in upskilling.
  • We would provide consulting for forming communities in drafting their purpose, agreements, and other systems, based on the work I am doing at NGL. We would also provide consulting for established communities to retrofit these foundations into their current organization.
  • We would structure our organizing in the same way that we will be recommending communities organize themselves, so there will be the chance to practice for those who are interested in or already living in community.
  • We will share any money earned based on the material needs of the members of the teams (gift economy). 

You do not need to be experienced in the above, as we will learn and grow together. What I am looking for is:
  • Deep commitment to nonviolence and the personal growth work it requires. 
  • Passion for community living, specifically with a desire to promote and support other communities
  • Willingness and Availablilty to meet regularly (over zoom for now) and to take on tasks relavant to our project
  • Local to Ireland (as eventually I'd like us to work together), if not local to Ireland, than in a similar timezone and willingness to take on tasks online, even if you wont be able to be visible at events we eventually create

Skills I'm looking for:
  • Basic NVC knowledge and daily practice (or willing to get it asap)
  • Comfortable with Google Documents (or willing to learn)
  • Fluent English
  • Comfortable with other digital needs (website, social media, newsletters, etc)
  • Super bonus: familiarity with legal requirements for group forming in Ireland (or willing to learn)

If this sounds like you, and you are interested in getting involved, I aim to hold a zoom call to answer any questions and support you in deciding to join this group or not. Email me to receive information about when this zoom call will be.
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    Selene Aswell
    GIFT ECONOMY COACH

    Selene is a facilitator, speaker, and coach. 

    Her work, based on NVC, is focused on needs-consciousness raising and integrating nonviolence into human relationships and communities.
    ​More about Selene. . .

    Book Selene
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    SHUA YOUNKIN
    Mindfulness COACH

    Shua has lived in intentional communities for most of the last decade.

    Shua has been actively integrating NVC for 13 years. Shua 
    enjoys building and fixing things, contact improv, practicing Focusing, and regenerative agriculture.

    ​More about Shua. . .
    Book Shua
    Gifted Workshop Recordings
    Exploring Gift Economy
    Assumptions Underlying NVC

    ​Intention Setting
    Listening to Connect
    Listening to Understand
    Committed to Nonviolence

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  • Blog
  • About Us
    • Reviews
    • Sign Up to Newsletter >
      • Whitelist Instructions
  • Offerings
    • Community Building Consultation
    • Book Selene
    • Book Shua
  • Upcoming Events
  • Gifted Resources
    • Gift Economy >
      • Exploring Gift Economy Calls and Recordings
    • Needs Consciousness >
      • Intention Setting
      • Assumptions Underlying NVC
    • Upskilling Foundations >
      • Listening to Connect
      • Listening to Understand
    • Committed to Nonviolence
    • NVC Resources >
      • Why NVC?
      • Printable Feelings/Needs Cheatsheet
      • DIY Needs Cards
      • Core Commitments
      • Recommended Books
  • Support Us
  • Contact Us