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Developing Self Love: An Online Course

3/21/2018

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Yesterday I launched an online course that I am SO EXCITED to share. This has been brewing in me for a while and it's time to bring it out to the light! This 8 week course introduces nonviolent communication and how we can harness it and self empathy to deepen our self love.  Spaces are quite limited because I’m offering such personal and direct support through coaching, so sign up ASAP. I aim to start on April 9th so registration will close on April 4th. 

As I was writing the welcome email to those who have already signed up (yay!), I felt touched by my own authentic sharing. When I sat down to write this, I definitely didn't plan to share so deeply, so quickly. But that's the beauty of a commitment to living authentically: realness comes out when we don't expect it, in small and simple ways.  I am sharing that welcoming letter below, because I think it provides a window into the power of engaging a practice self love and a taste of what this course is about.  
I am so excited to welcome you to this course. Working with this information over the past few years has drastically improved my self esteem. I've always felt that the choice to love myself was a radical act, a defiance in the face of a world that profits off of fear, sadness and self-rejection. But it wasn't until I started applying these principles from nonviolent communication in the form of a practice of self-empathy that I began to notice a shift.

What was the shift? Well, although I had many loving experiences, I was constantly seeking external validation of my worthiness. I was seeking external validation that I deserved love, that I deserved to love myself. I firmly believe that this is rooted in my evangelistic Christian upbringing... the fear that even God didn't love me because I was somehow intrinsically "bad". 

Nonviolent Communication provides practical, simple tools to dismantle those moralistic judgments that we hold, not only of other people, but of ourselves. I engaged a practice of self love: a daily habit of self-connection, self-empathy, and self-acceptance, which has resulted in a greater sense of self-empowerment.

This is what I want to share with you through this course. I don't claim to perfectly love myself all the time. But I have noticed a consistent improvement in my self esteem, my ability to create a space of peace within myself, and a greater capacity to choose my responses to triggers, rather than reacting unconsciously. I have noticed a ripple out improvement in my relationships: with my spouse and with the Divine. I have noticed that I have a greater capacity to experience joy and to receive love from others. And, I have noticed that I feel more motivated to and capable of effecting change in my life and the world around me. 

I'm so happy you are joining me on this brief journey to explore Developing Self Love through applying nonviolent communication tools and skills. 

With Love,
Selene
Learn More about this Course
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Poem: Welcome Home to the Present Moment

3/15/2018

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my heart is unfurling
my heart is unfurling--
a microcosm of opening spacial infinity
                             warmth
                                   depth
                                         light
                                            whole

the universe is found in my heart
and I
the bold explorer
going there inside myself

the Divine is there
meets me at the door inside myself:

welcome home,
welcome back to the present moment.
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Vibrantly Alive: The Antidote

3/12/2018

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There have been moments in my life, moments of such crystal clarity, where the experience of living shifts into sharp focus. Colors heightened as my sense open, as my emotions and spirit merge with my body, as I become fully alive in the present moment. Moments where the wheels in my spinning mind halt and my constant interpretation of every nuance of the world around me fades away, leaving only me, experiencing. Time ceases it’s ever-forward-movement.

Only Now is. I am.

In these moments, I may not have been free of pain, but I was free from suffering. Free from struggling to understand everything, struggling to hem life into my preconceived notions of what I should or shouldn’t be doing, saying, thinking, feeling. There may have been pain, but it was clean, piercing, like the ice cold splash of diving into a crystalline pool of water, so cold, but so alive.
​

I long for that feeling of aliveness, found in those moments sprinkled throughout my life. I dream of the day I’ll wake up, happy to be alive, happy with the day before me, and pleased with the day behind me. I wish for a daily experience of life ripe with that piercing joy found in touching the divine aliveness within.

Is it too much to ask for? To ask to be happy to be alive? To ask to enjoy my own existence?

This is the true desire of my heart, the wish beneath all other wishes. I’m calling this longing an urge to come alive, to thrive, to live my life vibrantly alive. To experience the full spectrum of existence, a vibrant rainbow of living energy. To fully feel all of myself, to accept myself, to hold myself as sacred and whole. Living vibrantly alive is a journey of self discovery, an awakening of the senses and a clearing of mental fog. It’s a celebration of the moment, an acceptance of what is and a choice to be where and who I am, currently.

Living Vibrantly Alive is the antidote to apathy, that boredom inherent in an unfulfilled life, that disempowerment in defeatism, that alienation from self, community, and life’s thrusting pulses.


This longing I feel, not only for myself, but for all of us.

I imagine a world, full of humans genuinely delighting in their own lives and existence on this beautiful Earth. What would those humans do? What new heights would we achieve together? How many social ills would fade away, a memory of distant lessons learned?


The choice to live vibrantly alive is a spiritual journey, a means towards self actualization and a foundation for human advancement. A generation of human society fully enjoying the spectrum of life, fully thriving, would be capable of so much more than we have yet experienced in recent history. A generation, in tune with the living energy within themselves, connected to that energy present within nature, thinking clearly and therefore empowered to act, is capable of redesigning and recreating our assumptions of self, society, and our entire trajectory on this planet.

This is the goal I have set for myself, to enjoy my own existence and to empower my action, to live vibrantly alive. And this is what I am sharing here, the insights I have, the tools I use, the process I undergo. And this is what I offer through my services, to empower those who work with me to come into connection with themselves, to shift what must be shifted, to take up what tools work for them, and to undergo the process of personal growth and expansion.

It has always been the urge of my heart to offer my hands in service. To minister to those in pain and to bring to light what insight and experience I have found in communion with my soul and with Spirit. I’m coming out now, again, bringing what I have found within myself to offer it to those who may be looking for it.

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    Selene Aswell
    GIFT ECONOMY COACH

    Selene is a facilitator, speaker, and coach. 

    Her work, based on NVC, is focused on needs-consciousness raising and integrating nonviolence into human relationships and communities.
    ​More about Selene. . .

    Book Selene
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    SHUA YOUNKIN
    Mindfulness COACH

    Shua has lived in intentional communities for most of the last decade.

    Shua has been actively integrating NVC for 13 years. Shua 
    enjoys building and fixing things, contact improv, practicing Focusing, and regenerative agriculture.

    ​More about Shua. . .
    Book Shua
    Gifted Workshop Recordings
    Exploring Gift Economy
    Assumptions Underlying NVC

    ​Intention Setting
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  • Blog
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  • Upcoming Events
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    • Gift Economy >
      • Exploring Gift Economy Calls and Recordings
    • Needs Consciousness >
      • Intention Setting
      • Assumptions Underlying NVC
    • Upskilling Foundations >
      • Listening to Connect
      • Listening to Understand
    • Committed to Nonviolence
    • NVC Resources >
      • Why NVC?
      • Printable Feelings/Needs Cheatsheet
      • DIY Needs Cards
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